skogsanda

The pandemic is getting to me; I am becoming more interested in concepts and thoughts, and less interested in the humans that entertain them. I am missing people and places that have never existed. I am losing sleep over conversations I shall never have. I am calling myself bad names, belittling my needs, and forgetting made decisions. I am erasing reality and holding on to past dreams just to have something to hold. (I put on my wedding ring today to remind myself that I am not a treeless leaf aimlessly blown into this yard. I remember; in a previous life, I moved to this country for I was dreaming of love and companionship and creativity. It turned into a nightmare but we had intended it to be the sweetest of dreams, I remember. ) Simplicity and focus usually helps me get through such times; will it help again? Can I read and write and work myself through this trauma as well? If I wasn't addicted to indoor plumbing, now would have been the perfect time to go hide in a